Did I Offend You? on tumblr

i (582)

funny
I want to put my evil inside you    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I don't always make fun of white people but when I do, they still laugh    HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I didn't make it to the gym today
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I don't always give a girl an orgasm    HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I was in the middle of texting you back    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
You want to know the funny part? I sooo killed my fucking kid! HAHA Suck it America!    HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I could never figure out why my eyes were bloodshot after sex
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
shoving confetti up your vagina so every queef feels like a party
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
Sorry I got semen in your eye    HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I don't need anger management classes, You need shut the fuck up classes
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I love you more than Chinese restaurants love cats
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I hear you think your shit doesn't stink?
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I think I left a blowjob at your house    HTML BB Direct Link Share
truth
Rapex (the anti rape condom)    HTML BB Direct Link Share
truth
What if I told you my GMO crops did not contaminate your organic crops Your organic crops contaminated my GMO crops    HTML BB Direct Link Share
zombie
I ate people before it was cool    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
Fine line between recreational use and addiction is the one I just snorted    HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I will enroll in anger management classes when you enroll in shut the fuck up classes
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
Sometimes I drink water to surprise my liver
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I look at people sometimes and think... Really? That's the sperm that won?    HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
The only thing I plan to accomplish at work today is to turn a gallon of coffee into a gallon of piss    HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
I miss you like an old man's urine stream misses the toilet    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I just realized that I am a nigger
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I don't see the resemblance
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
You do realize, darling, that if coffee were a man, I would leave you and not even say goodbye    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I don't always hit women but when I do I use my dick    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
Mommy why am I getting christmas presents in august    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
DUI Barbie    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I think we have a spy among us    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I love awkward and nerdy guys    HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
i like pudding
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
fuck me if I'm wrong but I think you wanna have sex with me
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I'm a ginger and I don't have a soul!  I will also creep you out with my yellow teeth, freckles and bugged out eyes!
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
funny
I dont remember this episode !!
   HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
the reason i swear so much is because fuck you    HTML BB Direct Link Share
ecards
and to think I almost swallowed you
   HTML BB Direct Link Share